The shadow of your smell

I felt your smell today, out of the blue. Suddenly, I’ve got felling that you are around me. I felt like when we were together. I miss this feeling so much. For some reason, today I need you more than for a long time… And of course you have nothing to do with my life now. I can’t call you, I can’t even write you an email… I can’t connect with you at all… You are stranger.. You are nobody.. You’ve chosen to be one.. Who could think, that you can leave me behind so easy.. Isn’t it funny?
I’m still lost..

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The world of my dreams

I was away for one week. I was in my dreams. I was in the world where you can be whole thing with nature, the world where you can leave all your troubles behind.. where you can just be…..

I miss it so much.. I miss the feeling of incredible silence under water, observing jumping net of sunlight there. I miss unthinkable sense of unity with everything that arises in me so easily and often when I’m a part of that world. I miss a light-hearted look of the fishes, the whole world that opens when you dive into the water… observing the sky from the water surface lying on my back…  the silent enjoying of sunrise with complete strangers… sense of incredible harmony and security. I miss a thousand of things, but I’m happy that I know about existence of such world and soon I will be back.

Miss you…

“Loneliness is never more cruel than when it is felt in close propinquity with someone who has ceased to communicate”. ~Germaine Greer

I miss you.. I have doubts if it was right to tell you that you shouldn’t call me this weekend. That we shouldn’t talk at all… we are done. I feel sorry that I hurt you when I told that we are nobody to each other… and it was your choice.. I feel for you.. I know that it’s stupid, but I feel your pain and want to help. I know that you have nobody to talk to, you have nobody who can really listen and care deeply. You are alone, despite all people around you. And I want to help as always… But I won’t :(. Thanks God I didn’t lose my mind completely.

Silent Talk

I can hear your whisper,
upon the breeze,
and see your smile,
in the sun.

I touch your kisses,
by the dew,
as the meadow lark,
sings his song.

I can smell your fragrance,
upon pedaled stems,
and the color abundance,
shows your joy.

I feel your tears,
when it rains,
soft, salty,
and warm.

I will always listen,
to how you speak to me,
silent purity,
upon my heart.

Paula Odell